One of the most important intangibles of building strong, sustainable businesses, communities and families is trust. Trust is a lot like love. It is core connective tissue supporting the quality and health of relationships. Strong families, vibrant communities, resilient organizations are all strong, vibrant and resilient because of the quality of their connections. In the kanji to the left trust is represented as the symbol for person + words/communication.
Traditionally, building up trust takes time–especially in high context, insular cultures. I remember a German sales executive lamenting his impending transfer back to Germany after 8 years in Japan. Although he was excited to return to his home country, he felt his hard work in building relationships was finally just beginning to pay off after nearly a decade! In many communities you are still considered an outsider until you and your family have been there for a couple of generations.
These days, most of us don’t have 8 years much less multiple generations to build relationships. So, what can we do to build trust as quickly and effectively as possible? Just as the kanji above shows, trust thrives on communication–authentic, transparent communication. And, trust is maintained and strengthened by not just what you say but what you do and how you do it. Simply, we have to walk the talk.
Authenticity
Authenticity springs from presence: self-awareness and contextual awareness. When you are self-aware it shows. Your posture, the quality of your eye contact, the energy you bring into the room all demonstrate you’ve done the hard work of getting to know your self. You know your role(s) and your strengths and weaknesses and you are secure in what you know. Contextual awareness begins with connection. It is the quality of your connection with the people in the room, your family, community and organization. From there, context expands to include the ecological, economic, political and cultural spheres of engagement. Being authentic means you are connected to and engaged with your self and the world around you. When you communicate, you communicate with the authority of these connections.
Transparency
Transparent communication basically means what you see and hear is what you get. You do as you say. Transparency is built on authenticity. People believe in you because of who you are. People understand where you’re coming from and where you want to go. There are little or no suspicions about hidden agendas, spin and your motivation for communicating.
Walking the Talk
It’s not just what you say, it’s what you do. And, it’s not just what you do, it’s the quality and the impact of your results that count. People will only believe in what you say if they see you do as you say. Seems simple, but it’s amazing how many of us disappoint here. People want to rely on you. They want want some level of consistency that they can depend on. Telling them is important. Showing them is more important. Telling and showing them consistently is absolutely essential to building trust. And, if you lack authenticity and transparency there is a very good chance you’ll lack consistency as well.
Trust takes time. However, through being authentic, transparent and walking the talk we create relationships that can grow trust quickly and sustainably. In many ways it’s old school. It’s not easy and it’s a life long practice. There are no short cuts and there is no try…
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